Is Time A Parents Enemy?
Milestones
When a child is born it is natural for a parent to think about the future. One thing that most parents want to know is how their child is doing compared to other children. A milestone is one way that a parent can watch their children grow up over increments of time. We can use language skills, agility or growth rate to gauge a child’s success towards maturity. We use these various turning point in life to show us stages of development or significant events (something a child has never done before).
Time Passes
Before Xander was born, my wife and I began thinking about his future and the various milestones he would face. Like most parents, we discussed his first steps, first words and even the first day of school. Time passes quickly and we have already seen several of the milestones we discussed. As a father, I had the “bitter-sweet” taste of experiencing a future milestone last week.
My wife and I both feel that our sons education is important and we want him to attend pre-kindergarten (pre-k). Enrollment for the fall term was last week. The plan was for all of us to go together and enroll Xan in pre-k. Unfortunately, plans don’t always work the way we want and my wife was unable to go with us when we enrolled for school (it was the first day of a new job for her).
Excitement Builds
I had a hard time sleeping the night before I enrolled Xander in school. My thoughts kept drifting towards “change” and Xander being gone part of the day. I was feeling happy, sad and excited. I am still not sure I ever drifted off to sleep. I have always known that my job as a parent is to allow my child to grow up. I realize that our life together is only temporary and someday soon I will let him go out, on his own, into the world.
The next morning, Xander was so excited about enrolling for school that he woke up on his own (extra early). Xan acted so grown up with a confidence and maturity that surprised me. As we were getting ready to leave I explained to him that we were enrolling for the fall and he wouldn’t go to school today. He looked at me with his new-found maturity and said, “I don’t go now. I go later.” Normally, on a cold morning, Xan would argue with me about wearing a coat or gloves. Today, he asked for his coat, gloves and a scarf without incident. As we drove to the school he never stopped talking, “I going to school!” or “I play with kids at school!“
I did my parental job, filled out the paperwork and turned it in. I did my best and acted excited for Xander but I know that our life is about to change. School is where a child’s life journey begins to take form. Children are able to share ideas with their peers and make many new discovers about the world. It is something that Xander looks forward too and I will give him the space he needs to grow.
The maturity level of my son was clear when we finished and it was time to leave. He left the school without a fuss. As we were walking back to the car he smiled at me and told me to look back at the school. I looked towards the school and I heard him say, “That my school soon!” I smiled and answered him, “Yes, son it is your school soon.” I am almost positive he didn’t see the tear in my eye.
Time – Friend and Foe
We measure time in seconds, minutes and hours. You hear people say that it either moves to fast or to slow with little variance in either direction. Many people wish they could stop time or relive something in the past. Books, movies and television programs show us ideas about trying to control time. Unfortunately, it is something that is elusive and we can’t control. Time is precious and it is the greatest enemy of a parent.
In my opinion, the most amazing thing about having children is watching them grow up. As a stay-at-home dad, I have been fortunate to watch things through my son’s eyes and sense of wonder. He has allowed me to see beauty in things that I had long forgotten from my childhood. My son has given me a new-found appreciation for dinosaurs, numbers and building blocks. As a father, I believe that enrolling for school is a milestone that is as important as the first day of school. Hopefully, I won’t cry as much when that day comes.
Milestones are a way that parents can measure a child’s maturity or growth rate. Did you have any special milestones in your child’s life that made you sad or will someday in the future make you sad? Do you think all milestones are equally important? Tell me in the comments!
You can read my last post here: The Real Twas The Night Before Christmas If you like this post you can follow me on my facebook fan page, Dadblunders.
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Tags: first day of school, kindergarten, significant events, stages of development
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I envy you because you are going through stages that l enjoyed when my kids were young. Make sure to capture those milestones because time really flies. One milestone that I missed is the point when my first son became too heavy for me to lift him without straining my back.
What makes me happy is that I work in the same school that my kids attend, which means I sometimes have lessons with them and I spend more time with them than the average parent does.
Churchill,
It was a definite milestone in my life! I don’t know if Xander will remember this day in the future. I do know that it is a day I won’t forget. It was the main reason I choose to write about it. I hope someday he might read about it and know that it was a very hard day for his dad. It was the day I knew my little boy was actually growing up.
Aaron
“I am almost positive he didn’t see the tear in my eye”…those words. You are such a very wonderful and soft dad, Aaron! I know, Xander is so proud to have you!
Keith,
Thank you so much,
I just wrote it as it happened. I don’t want to pretend that I am not a little emotional about the whole ordeal because I am. I think most dads are a little emotional about it. The problem is many of them don’t know how to express it…..
Aaron
Great post! I can relate! My son’s first day at preschool was torture! Like you, I didn’t sleep a wink the night before. Waiting to pick him up was awful! Was he crying? Was he asking for us? Would the teacher like him? What kind of school would hire a teacher who doesn’t like children?!! It was an anxious time! We are both so blessed to have sons who were so enthusiastic to start school! Awesome job, Dad!
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Justin,
It is probably the greatest challenge I have faced thus far as a dad. I joke about being ready for Xander to go to school but I am not sure I am near as ready as he is. I know that our lives will change forever the day he goes and there is no looking back. I hope I have instilled in him some of the things he will need to get “both” of us through the school years.
Aaron
Beautifully written. It always seems as if you’re walking in the sprint that your children call life.
Active Duty Dad
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Theron,
You are right on the mark with your comment. We try walking and they keep on sprinting. If we are lucky we might catch a few glimpses and remember things when they were simple. It is one journey I am definitly glad to be a part of.
Aaron