Life Fast Forward – TheWorld4Realz

The moment a child is born a parents job is working towards letting them go. What would it be like if you could write a letter to your child in the future? Have you ever considered what you would tell your child about life and being a parent? There is no right or wrong answer. It’s all about being open and honest with our kids. I am fortunate to have a great mom this week, Andi-Roo, who writes at The World 4 Realz. She looked at Life Fast Forward with her son, Christopher.

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A Letter to My Son

 

Dear Christopher:

If I could only tell you one thing, from one parent to another, it would be this: Love with all your heart, and be open and honest. This pretty much covers every lesson I could hope to impart, but I’ll expand here since I’ve been given the room to do so.

Love with all your heart.

Love so much it hurts. It’s very likely I don’t even have to tell you this, as you are already a very loving young man. But sometimes it’s hard for guys to show how they feel. Don’t let that hold you back with your child.

You haven’t always had the greatest examples of this in your childhood, and I’ve tried to compensate, but it bears saying out loud: It’s okay to fall in love with your baby, to keep falling in love over and over throughout your baby’s growth, to stay in love with your baby even when it’s not a baby anymore.

Your baby, no matter what age, should never have to wonder if it is loved. Hopefully I have given that to you, and your step-dad now too, but if we failed, you know now what to do. Be better than me. Be better than your steps and your bio. Be better than your grandparents. Be the best of us, and then some. Love freely and openly, and never stop.

Be open and honest.

When you present issues, don’t offer your side as fact. Don’t hide the other side. Don’t shelter your child. Let your baby know that your opinion is just that — an opinion — and that there are others who disagree. Tell why they disagree. And tell your child it’s okay to disagree with you, too. We are all here learning the ropes together.

If you are open and honest with your child, there will never be issues of rebellion, acting out, and being secretive. You won’t have to wonder where your child is at 3:00 in the morning. I’m so lucky this was never a concern — even now, as an adult, you always let me know who you’re with and what you’re up to. Even though you don’t have to anymore, you still do it. Because I’ve been open with you, you are open with me. Remember this with your own child.

Don’t try and teach your child to avoid mistakes. Teach your child, instead, how to deal with the mistakes that are bound to be made. And then teach your child that there are no mistakes, not really. There are choices, and there are repercussions, and there are aftermaths. The choice itself is small beans compared to how you will live the rest of your life from that point forward.

When you leave the house to go out with your friends, these are the words with which I send you off: “Have fun. Be safe. Make smart choices. Call if you need me. I love  you.” This sums up everything I want you to take away as you go off into your own life. And this also sums up everything I hope you will instill in your own child.  Even now, as I offer this advice, I know the decisions are still yours. And I will love you, regardless of what you choose.

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About the author:

Andi-Roo (@theworld4realz) can be found at http://www.theworld4realz.com/, where she rants about the “arbitrivial” nature of human beings, begs for Coke, and attempts to embrace social media. Currently at work on her first novel, Green Market, and an advocate for abused teens, Andi-Roo lives in Ohio with her husband, two kids, a polydactyl, and a shark.

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Beautiful Life Fast Forward letter Andi! I think Christopher has had a great teacher in learning how to make decisions. You have nothing to worry about. You have done a great job, mom! Thank you so much for sharing your heart and letter with everyone.

Andi didn’t mention it earlier but you can also follow her on facebook at The World 4 Realz.

For everyone else….If you have anything you would like to tell or ask Andi please do so in the comments! As parents  we have to support each other and sometimes that means just letting each other know “you’re doing a good job!”

Is there anything in particular you would tell your children? Would you remind them to just enjoy the moments or not get mad when their children don’t listen? I am still looking for more parents that would like to guest blog and write a letter to their children.

Read my latest post here: Family Traditions – Addams Style and be sure to check out the rest of the Life Fast Forward letters including the one I wrote to my son.

 

 

Tags: child, falling in love, grandparents, heart, young man